wait, i'm still here? yeah lol hi

I know, I seem to have disappeared from my own blog recently--maybe the past month or so? Okay, like thirty-five days, but who's counting, haha. Anyway, yikes. This kind of reeks because I'm pretty sure I had tons to blog and write about, because it's not like the past month has been uneventful. It's been anything but that actually, and the truth is, ever since my second year of college started, my reliance on my Google calendar has increased exponentially (and I want to say that I'm using "exponentially" as a hyperbole but I kid you not, my days have been needing some pretty anal scheduling). Which is good, I mean it has a good side--for one, I'm constantly working off of several to-do lists, so I've been a pretty productive busy bee. But I mean yin and yang, so there is a bad side, which primarily has to do with the fact that my to-do list is well, overflowing. So I'm kind of all over the place?

No, more like my heart is in a thousand places. Life has been a thrill ride recently, and I don't know if that's the promise of a new school year or not, but I like it. I'm doing things that don't only satisfy my productivity, but my passion, and if there's anything to blame for making my heart feel like it's in a thousand places, it's my goddamn passion. I'm trying this thing out where I kind of chill a little bit, because honestly there are only so many hours in a week, and as it stands, my commitments are at just the right cap. So yes, Kate, take a freaking chill pill and focus on where you're at now.

Somedays I wish I wasn't a student anymore, but literally after wistfully imagining life without the academic intensity of a thousand suns, I kind of don't know what to do with myself. I mean, as much as I complain about readings and papers and midterms and going to class, it's fulfilling to be in this growth and learning process, and the cherry on top of it all is that I'm working towards a bank of knowledge that really stimulate my interests (oh yeah #mediastudies and #linguistics). But it's also kind of scary. In a way I know what I want, but don't. And maybe that's just me looking into the future a little too much, but literally the ever so daunting future is two years from now, and what am I supposed to be doing after? An internship? An actual job? Grad school? Traveling? I DON'T KNOW, AND THE FACT THAT THERE ARE SO MANY POSSIBILITIES BOTH SCARE AND EXCITE ME. I just don't want to be still, that's for sure.

Anyway, back to now. I've been pretty happy recently--a little more than just content, because things have been pretty sweet (& stressful but u already know #berzerkeley). I miss home (and my puppies) and I really need to make more time to call my family and just ask about how life is because being on opposing sides of California sucks a little bit. But it's going to be okay because I've already booked my flights home for the winter, aw yeaaaah. Other things that make me happy: core forty six, coffee in the morning, trumies, fraaaands, the trinity that is photoshop, indesign, and illustrator, and this pretty solid guy I've been crushing on (wait what now).

It thoroughly upsets me that I've neglected to blog and write in the past month, but I'm going to try being a bit more frequent with posting on here, swearrrrr.

p.s. currently listening:

The High of Life from balmlives on 8tracks Radio.